Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Note to Mel; time for a good confession

Mel,
We,your bretheren in the Catholic community are saddened to hear of your most recent self-degradation.
But we are not surprised. We saw it coming.
Once you allowed the success of "The Passion of the Christ" which we worked tirelessly to promote, go to your head, we knew the enemy had you in his grasp. We waited in vain for another religious blockbuster.
But you made a bloody epic which had no redeeming qualities.
You had your own church and your own priest, yet somehow you forgot the sacrament of confession.
Your drunken rampages and embarassing anti-Semitic diatribes made even your longsuffering wife of three decades give up on you. Who could blame her?
You forgot your seven children and lived shamelessly in sin with a Russian model. The world didn't mind that, in fact they rejoiced that the holy man, Saint Mel was now no better than the fornicating crowd in Hollywood. They had dragged you down to the gutter. You knew better, yet you complied.
And you are expecting happiness and fulfillment?
Now that you have again put your foot in your mouth, Holllywood is rejecting you.

Confess your sins, repent and apologize for your scandalous racial epithets.

You may never redeem your public image, but you can get yourself right with God.
We are praying for your return to the Church. We love the Latin Mass too, Mel.
Come home to Rome.

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